Thin & Crispy With Extra Booze, Please

When you’ve just had a baby there are two types of visitors, those who have kids themselves and those who do not. The ones who know what it’s like to have kids will instantly head straight to the kitchen – sleeves rolled up, kettle on, what can I do to help? Visitors who are yet to spawn will usually sit there dumbstruck. If you hand the baby to them they go white with fear and hand her back immediately, and the sight of a nappy being changed is a cue to scarper. It’s a cliché but the thing about not knowing what it’ll be like until it happens to you is the best there is. A recent father gave me a great tip last week, which kind of sums it up. If you wish to visit friends who have recently sprogged, either turn up with a take-a-way pizza and a pack of cold lagers or forget it.